The Need for Strong Men

When we look at America and see the moral decline, we can blame a lot of things, but I want you to know that the first place we have to look is at the men. Not men who are not saved and don’t care about the spiritual decline; I’m talking about the men in the church rising up and holding ourselves accountable to lead our families in the ways that God has called us to lead them. Too often we pass off the responsibility that God created us to take on because we have other things to do. “I’m too busy with work,” “I have my social life to keep up with,” or “there’s that hobby that takes up so much of my time.” I’m not saying that these are areas that you cannot build into your life, but we must understand what is of eternal perspective and what is only temporary. As men, we are called to be the spiritual leaders of our families. We want our children to excel in life, but the most important area they need to excel in is learning who Jesus Christ is and how to follow Him on a daily basis. As men, we need to assure our wives that we are in this together and we will take the lead with our families. As men, we need to stand up for Christ when we see other men not living the way they should, loving others enough to pour into them and help them get back on track.

As a boy, I was not the most athletic, but that didn’t stop me from wanting to play sports. I had coaches and other players who would call me out if I was doing something wrong and show me how to do it the right way. They were not doing this to be mean but instead wanted the best for me and the team. I remember one football practice we had when I was a freshman in high school. We were doing a tackling drill where the bigger lineman would hit a running back low and then the smaller safety or corner would come and hit the running back higher. I was a short kid, so when it was my turn to do the drill I was hitting the defensive lineman in the back more than the running back. The coach was not very pleased and told me that I’d be running laps if I did it again. Sure enough, I did it again and I was off and running. I tried to explain that I was too short, but the coach wouldn’t listen, so I had to learn how to overcome my problem. I learned that I needed to get a running start and then jump and launch myself at the running back. I learned how to overcome my weakness to accomplish what the team needed done.

How often do we see a man going the wrong direction and, rather than calling him out because we love and care about him, we just hope he corrects himself? As a man, I don’t want to wait and react; instead, out of love I challenge men today to get involved and help other men become stronger in their faith.

Unconditional Love

We all want to be loved and appreciated, and we live with this fear: “If the people around me knew the real me, they might not like me.” There’s a quote I read that put it this way: “I’m afraid to tell you who I am because if I really reveal what I’m like and if you don’t like it then I’m up a creek, because I’m all I got.” We take away the value we bring to a relationship. Sometimes we don’t give those around us the respect it takes to know that they love us and will continue to love us even though we’re not perfect. I struggle when I’m around people who try to fool me by acting as if they are perfect. Hello….none of us are perfect! Even Jesus condemned those men who brought the woman caught in adultery for acting as if they were perfect. Remember the story found in John 8? They brought this woman, and by law she was to be stoned, but Jesus looked at her and had nothing but love and compassion for her. He made a simple statement to the men, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” As those men stood there letting that statement sink in, they knew that they were not blameless, and so they all slowly turned and left until the only ones remaining were the woman and Jesus. But here is the amazing part of the story: Jesus looked at her and said that since no one else had condemned her, then neither did He. He told her, “Go and don’t sin any more.” The one who had every right to condemn her was the one who showed the greatest mercy.

Those who are closest to us should be shown the greatest mercy by us. Why? Because we understand that none of us are perfect, and we do not love them because they are perfect; we love them because God brought them to a very special place in our lives. This is real maturity—the character of Christ shining in our lives. I’ve seen it demonstrated in my family my whole life. One story that stands out occurred when Tami and I had only been married a few years. Tami’s grandfather was a great man, and he took great pride in his car. Every two years he’d trade it in and get another one. One afternoon Tami was at her parents’ house visiting and while she was there her grandfather drove in and parked behind Tami. Tami and I were driving a full-size converted van and she left that day to come home for the evening. She jumped in the van and didn’t think about a car being behind her and backed right into her grandfather’s new car. She was devastated and didn’t go inside to tell them what had happened, instead driving straight home and coming into the house crying because of what she’d done. She couldn’t face her grandfather getting mad at her, so I called him and explained what happened. His maturity kicked in and he had Tami get on the phone so he could console her. He affirmed his love for her, that a car can be repaired, and that the love of family is far more important than any car. There’s nothing more important in life than the love you give and receive from your family. They will be with you no matter what, so don’t be afraid to be honest about your feelings. 

I learned a great lesson that day. If it had been my car that was struck, because of my immaturity I would have said some things to Tami that wouldn’t have been very nice. The things I would have said would have made her feel worse than she already felt and I would have thought I was justified in saying them. Thank the Lord, I’m not that same man any longer. My family needs to understand my love for them. We are not perfect, but in Christ our love for one another can be made perfect. Work on building strong relationships with those who are closest to you. Love them, forgive them, and accept them for who they are.

Understanding Our Differences

Over the past few days I’ve found myself dreaming about the nice, hot days of summer because this cold spell has not been any fun. I often hear from people that I should be used to cold weather because I grew up in the North, but my response is, “I will never get used to the cold.” I enjoyed the winter activities of building snow men, having snowball fights, making snow angels, building tunnels in the snow, and playing football in it when I was younger, but as I grew older my body changed. I got to the point of despising those cold days when I could never get warm. I know that God made all of us unique and there are those who prefer the cold days of winter over the hot days of summer. Part of the joy of life is that we are all so different.

Tami and I will be celebrating our 32nd anniversary this year and we have both had a lot of growing up to do through the years. We have had those moments of driving each other crazy, wondering why in the world God brought us together. But we’ve had many more moments of enjoying the life that God has blessed us with. Marriage is not easy because you are bringing two individuals together that have different wants and needs. For me, marriage is learning that it’s not about me but what is best for Tami and how I help her become what God wants her to be in life. Tami has a lot of drive and is a wonderful mom and Mimi. She is successful in the business world at the company she works for, even with all the stresses that her job brings into her life. She’s an amazing wife who is constantly stepping up to help me look better with my wardrobe and in my ministry. And, most importantly, she is a woman who has a passion for God.

As a husband, I try to bring into Tami’s life everything she needs to feel complete. There are days when I’m not very good at deciphering what she needs, but eventually I figure it out. What I do know is that I’m not perfect and neither is Tami, but we are committed to each other. We’ve grown and gotten better at reading each other, but we still have those days. The most important thing we can do to grow our relationship together is to remain close to God and His plan for our lives. If I’m fulfilling God’s plan for my life, then I’m showing Tami how important she is to me by being there for her and helping her when times get tough. Our society is trying to destroy the family by changing the values that the Bible commands us to live by. Don’t allow that to hinder the plan God has for you and your spouse. Instead, be committed, go “all in,” draw a line in the sand, do whatever it takes to show that you’re in your marriage for the rest of your life. We deal with enough stresses in life, so let’s not bring on another stress by creating doubt about our commitment to our marriage. Life is about relationships, and everything we are looking at deals with relationships.

 

Celebrating Christmas

I’m sitting here today and still find myself amazed that Christmas is upon us. What an exciting time of year with the business of preparing for the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ. I have fond memories through the years of ways we’ve celebrated Christmas—children’s musicals, plays, communion, candlelight services, caroling, and many other ways. Every one of those ways may have been different, but they all had the same purpose: to rejoice, because the Son of God was born on Christmas morning to become our redeemer and Savior.

I would encourage each of us to find our own special way to celebrate the birth of Christ in the midst of all the things happening. Sit down and read the Christmas story from Luke 2. If you have children, take a few moments and talk with them about the true meaning of Christmas and how it impacts our lives on a daily basis. Don’t be politically correct and tell people “Happy Holidays,” but instead remind them that it is a celebration of our faith in Christ and wish them a “Merry Christmas.”

I Know My Ham....

Last week was a wonderful time as we had the opportunity to celebrate Thanksgiving with our family and friends.  I was assigned a couple of tasks in preparation of the big day and I set out on Wednesday to accomplish those tasks.  One of them was to go to the store and get a ham—I mean, Thanksgiving without a ham is like watching a Rangers baseball game and not eating a hot dog.  So, I went to the store and found the section where the hams were located.  When I got to the hams I noticed that there were only two types available.  I know you are wondering if there’s a point to this, but here it is: they had types of ham available but they looked totally different.  The first was your typical spiral ham that was big, round, and had a bone in it.  Although this is a great ham, it takes a lot of room in the oven, and with a large turkey and all the other great sides it makes cooking everything difficult.  The other ham was deboned, so it was flat; the shape looked odd but it clearly said ‘ham’ on it and it would take up less space in an oven.  I bought it after much debate in my mind because if it says it’s a ham then I believe it’s a ham.

Here’s where the problem comes into play.  I took the ham home, and when the family saw it they were not happy with the choice of hams I’d made.  I heard about how my ham looked like bacon, it was ugly, and everything else from those who seemed to lose the spirit of Thanksgiving.  LOL!  I assured them that everything was going to be fine and I took over the preparation and cutting of the ham.

I’m so thankful that when Christ came to this earth He didn’t look at me and say that I just don’t look right.  He gave His very life that I might have life.  And this applies to everyone reading this blog.  Christ gave His very life because He saw the value in you and wants to have an eternal relationship with you.  If we’re not careful we can fall into the mindset that we don’t measure up, so how could God ever love us? But that’s the very reason Christ came: to seek and to save the lost, including those who don’t feel like they are worthy of being loved. 

The good news is that the ham not only turned out to be perfect but many of the family commented that it was the best ham they’d ever had.  In fact, it was so good that we even had another meal with the leftovers a few days later.  My plan was a success.  Likewise, once Christ became my Savior I learned that God has a plan for my life.  And that plan is a good plan where I can impact others in a positive way by showing them the love that God has for them.

Thanksgiving Proclamation

Tomorrow, as a nation we will celebrate Thanksgiving.  This is my favorite national holiday because it is a time for us to stop and reflect on the goodness and blessings of God.  How sad to realize that our society has tried so hard to push God out of our lives and our history because it hasn’t always been like that.  There was a time when this nation understood the need to worship the Almighty God and seek His guidance and forgiveness.  That was evident from the first Thanksgiving proclamation given by our first president, George Washington, on October 3, 1789. 

To remind us of our heritage and remind us of those things we should be passing on to our children, I am posting that proclamation as my article this week. 

Thanksgiving Proclamation

Issued by President George Washington, at the request of Congress, on October 3, 1789

By the President of the United States of America, a Proclamation.

Whereas it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favor; and—Whereas both Houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requested me “to recommend to the people of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness:”

Now, therefore, I do recommend and assign Thursday, the 26th day of November next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be; that we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble thanks for His kind care and protection of the people of this country previous to their becoming a nation; for the signal and manifold mercies and the favor, able interpositions of His providence in the course and conclusion of the late war; for the great degree of tranquillity, union, and plenty which we have since enjoyed; for the peaceable and rational manner in which we have been enabled to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national one now lately instituted; for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed, and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and, in general, for all the great and various favors which He has been pleased to confer upon us.

And also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations, and beseech Him to pardon our national and other trangressions; to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually; to render our National Government a blessing to all the people by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed; to protect and guide all sovereigns and nations (especially such as have shown kindness to us), and to bless them with good governments, peace, and concord; to promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the increase of science among them and us; and, generally, to grant unto all mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as He alone knows to be best.

Given under my hand at the City of New York the third day of October in the year of our Lord 1789.

Different Perspectives

Most mornings when I wake up my first task is to let the dogs go outside. When I opened the door to our back yard this morning I was hit by the cold air that had moved into the area overnight, and it served as a quick reminder of why I left the north. I don’t like the cold and can’t imagine the day when I’ll ever like it again. So, to me, this is a crummy weather day in Texas and I hear that tomorrow is going to be even colder. Yet, in the midst of my complaining about a cold day and wishing I could just wrap up inside a blanket, eat chili, warm cinnamon rolls, and watch some movies, I’m reminded of a family in our church that is so excited about today.

You see, today, around noon, they are going to the hospital to welcome their new baby into the world. Jason and Melinda are a wonderful young couple who love the Lord and have already been blessed with a wonderful son, Bubba (as they call him…LOL, gotta love the south), and now their family is going to grow by one more child. They aren’t thinking about the cold or the cloudy day, wishing they had a warm blanket and comfort food, instead they are rejoicing at the joy of God’s blessing and looking forward to many years of celebrating the love of a family with the new baby.

Isn’t it funny how life can be at times? What seems to one person to be a day of misery is for another family a day of celebrating the blessings and joys that God brings into our lives. You see, the only difference in the two scenarios is the outlook on that day. I feel like today is going to be a day of misery because I’m cold. Even sitting here typing I find myself wishing I had gloves on because my hands are cold, but those that know me know that my hands are always cold. And less than a mile away sits a family who could care less about the weather or anything else that is happening today because their lives are filled with anticipation of the bundle of love that will be in their arms in just a few hours.

God has never promised us that every day of our lives with Him would be filled with joy, laughter, and easy going. Instead, He has promised that He would always be there with us, during the good and the bad, during the joy and the tears, during the days when we are so cold we wish we could jump on a plane and head to Cancun as well as the days when we celebrate the life He has given us. I want you to know that I’m here when you’re having those bad days and just need someone to pray with you or offer a word of encouragement. At the same time, I’m here to celebrate the blessings of God that come your way. We are a family and families are meant to rejoice together and help each other in the tough times. What are you facing today? Remember that Tami and I pray for your family every week, and even though we are powerless to change things, we serve a God that does not know the word impossible. He can do whatever needs to be done for you today!