Speaking a Different Language

This past week I have spent a lot of time with Latino workers who cannot speak English. As I’ve been with these men, I feel like I’m missing opportunities to make an impact on their lives because I can’t really communicate with them. We smile and offer kind greetings, but beyond that we are hopeless. How sad that I live in an area where so many men and women don’t speak my language and I can’t express what I’m feeling with them.

I’ve learned through life that we can even speak the same language and yet be in different worlds. Tami and I have been married for nearly 32 years, and yet there are days when it seems like we don’t even understand what the other is saying. Yesterday was a classic example of this when we were out shopping for new French Doors to replace our sliding glass door. Our house was built in the late 1990s, so our sliding glass door is smaller than the standard door installed in new homes today. We discovered that we would have to special order one and started going through the questions to pick out the door for us. As the sales rep went through the many questions, he came to questions dealing with color and styles. I have learned through the years that it’s best to let Tami choose what she likes to keep the process moving. I’ll say something if I really don’t like what she’s picked out, but most times I’m fine with her taste in décor. Well, we started getting questions about what we wanted the windows to look like, what style of handles would we like, and how would we like the door to lock. I would look to Tami for an answer and she’d tell me that she didn’t understand, so I’d show her pictures and explain different features but kept getting the deer in the headlights look. As we left the store I knew that Tami had no idea of what we’d just picked out because her mind couldn’t grasp it. Later that evening when we were alone I explained everything and she could finally imagine what we were talking about. I will have to go back to the store and make some changes because once she understood she could express what she wanted.

In life we are all going to come across these types of situations, and I’ve learned that I need to find a way around the communication barriers. With the work crew at my house I find someone who can speak Spanish and ask that person to help me. At the store I keep asking the sales rep questions until I understand what we are talking about. My question for you is this: how do you find the answers when you have questions that relate to your spiritual life? Do you turn to the Bible? How about prayer? And God has placed in your life spiritually mature Christians who can help you. Many feel like the truths of living a godly life are a foreign language and don’t try to discover the deeper things God has for them. But I can assure you, if you start pursuing those spiritual truths, they will begin to make sense and you will be able to live a life complete in the Lord. Remember what Jesus taught us in Matthew 7:7: “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”

Did I Just Do That?

Have you ever had one of those moments when you’ve said to yourself, “Did I really just do that?” Well, I had one of those moments Sunday evening. Tami and I are starting a massive remodeling of our house. During our consultation with a designer we were throwing around several ideas on things we could do to update our kitchen. One of the things that Tami and I have seen in several newer homes is a sink island that offers two ways to get into the family room. We really like that style and thought we might see what it’d look like in our home. The consultant and her construction supervisor said that they didn’t think it would work because they thought our plumbing didn’t come from under our slab but instead through the walls. They just left it at that and headed on to their next meeting. Well, I wouldn’t take their word on it, so I decided on Sunday that I’d go on a plumbing expedition.

I have a reciprocating saw and it was just itching to give it a go with me. So I pulled it out, crawled under our kitchen sink, and went to work. About the time I started, our daughter and her husband walked in to join the expedition. I made my first cut thinking I’d cut out the cabinet in pie-like pieces until I could break it away and reach down to the slab. My first two cuts were perfect, and as I started my third cut my son-in-law said, “Don’t hit the water pipe.” Duh…I know that! But it wasn’t two seconds later that I heard the sound of pressurized water, and bam…it hit me and was spraying everywhere. I’d hit the water pipe.

All I could think was, Thanks Justin! ha! No, I knew exactly what I needed to do. I ran outside to the main water shut-off valve and turned off the water. Good news: no more spraying water. Bad news: no water at all. Here it is Sunday evening and I have a broken water pipe and stores are going to be closing. I knew that I couldn’t waste any time, so I headed out immediately to our nearest hardware store to see what I could do.

At the store I discovered this wonderful product made just for guys like me. It’s a tape that looks like the material casts are made of and you soak it in water for 30 seconds, then wrap it around the leaking pipe. After 30 minutes of drying time your leak will be fixed. Excited but a little skeptical, I bought it and headed home. It was easy enough to find the hole, so I opened up my kit and couldn’t believe my eyes—someone had taken the special tape and I had nothing to wrap around my broken pipe. So here I go, back to the store to get another package of tape, and this time they were closing. I opened the box to make sure the tape was there, exchanged the package, and headed home praying it’d work. I soaked the tape, let it cure, and turned on the water. Sure enough, it sealed the leak, and here it is Tuesday evening and still holding strong. What a handy man!

What did I learn form this? First, don’t invite your son-in-law to watch you when doing a project that can go horribly wrong. Second, even the smallest of holes in a pipe can put out a lot of water. The hole was less than 1/16 of an inch, but that’s all the water needed. Third, don’t panic; figure out the best course of action and then react. Little water was spilled and the hole was repaired in a short time. In life, I need to practice the same principles. Don’t panic when things seem out of control but stop and think of the best solution for the situation. With the Holy Spirit’s guidance and acting in faith those problems will be overcome.

What's Really Important

Last week at our couples retreat I shared that Tami is not the greatest of drivers.  Now, she is an amazing wife, mother, and grandmother.  She is an organized and task-driven person, but she just lacks some focus when it comes to the more boring routines of life.  Through the years I’ve been amazed at some of the driving maneuvers she’s performed.  Here are a few for your reading enjoyment.  I’ve seen bumpers ripped off cars because Tami caught them with her bumper while backing out of parking spots.  She has backed into the car of a woman she was going to follow to an event while the woman was waiting to back out herself.  Tami backed into the driver’s side door of her grandfather’s new car, side-swiped a post in a church parking lot, blew out tires while turning a corner too quickly and hitting the curb, and ripped off the passenger door mirror because she got too close to road construction barrels.  These are all due to a lack of attention while driving, and it used to drive me crazy when she called to tell me what she’d done.  I would often get angry and be more concerned about the car than about her well-being.

Last June, our car was hit in the passenger door by a young woman who went through a stop sign.  She hit right where Tami was sitting, and the force caused us to go into a sideways slide.  The accident seemed to last a very long time but ended a few seconds later when our SUV rolled over.  Our guardian angels were definitely watching over us because other than a few cuts and scrapes, some sore muscles, and a bad headache for Tami where her head hit the door, we walked away unharmed from that accident.  I came to realize that no car is worth the health and safety of my family.  I came to realize it was not fair of me to be so critical about a possession and I needed to worry more about the one I loved.  Yes, my beautiful wife may not be the greatest driver, but that’s not why I married her.  I married her because she completed me.  Her gifts, talents, and support are far greater than any dent in a door or bumper laying on the ground.  I am doing my best to not be critical of the things that don’t matter in the grand plan that God has for John and Tami.

God has a grand plan for each of us...don’t allow a few bumps to rob you of the joy of being involved in the plan He has for us.  Enjoy the ride that God has waiting for you and find how to get the most out of it for you and your family.   Oh, before I forget, while telling the couples about some of Tami’s driving mishaps, she stopped me during the retreat to inform me that she had a mishap earlier in the day.  What can I do but just smile and say, “That’s my Tam!”  

I Just Don't Understand

Last week, Tami and I went to a meeting that ended around 9:30 p.m. We didn’t have a chance to eat dinner prior to the meeting, so we decided to stop for a quick dinner while heading home. We chose a restaurant close to our house that has great food and quick service.

We walked in and asked for a booth where we could sit and debrief about the busy day we were wrapping up. The hostess told us that there were no booths available and proceeded to take us to a large room with several tables and booths. We again asked to sit at one of the open booths because they were larger and more comfortable but were told they were closed, so we were seated at a tiny table that could barely hold two people. Less than two steps to our left was a table for four; we asked if we could sit there and were told it too was closed. So here we sit, at a table that won’t be able to hold our food and drinks, while two steps away is a table with enough room for everything and five steps away is a nice, large, comfortable booth. We started laughing because of the insanity. Our waitress couldn’t take a few steps to reach us at a different table, but we had to put stuff on the floor to fit our dinner on the table. Oh, and one more interesting fact: before we left they brought in a couple and sat them in one of the booths we had requested!

On Sundays, we gather together to worship God.. we're not told where we can or cannot sit. You’ll be blessed if you just open up your heart to the praise & worship and message that will challenge your heart. You will hopefully be greeted by warm, friendly smiles from people who are happy that you're at church. You won’t gain any calories and in fact will burn some calories. But the greatest thing is that you will experience the love of God if you open your heart up to Him.

Unexpected Obstacles

This morning started out as a typical morning—up and getting ready for the day by doing the things I do every morning, with the added task of making sure the trash is out because it’s Tuesday, trash day at the Bullards’. Most mornings Tami heads off to work before I do. I tend to stay in bed a little longer and for some reason today the bed felt really good. So, now I’m ready to head out the door and I start looking for the key to my car. It doesn’t take long before I realize that it’s not here, Tami has it. You see, on Mondays Tami takes my car to work so I can drive her SUV to the office. Every Monday, the staff goes out to lunch together after our staff meeting and for some reason the men just don’t like snuggling up in the back seat of my car. I don’t understand what their issue is because I’m just fine where I’m sitting! LOL… anyways, to help keep the staff happy I borrow Tami’s car so they have plenty of manly room in the back seat. 

When we get home on Mondays we really don’t think a lot about keys and cars because we have to get dinner going, talk about the day, and figure out what has to be accomplished that evening. Before we know it, it’s time to go to bed, and our last goodnight of the evening is not, “Where are my keys?”

So I walk out this morning and realize I have no car keys. I have to make the dreaded call, and I call it dreaded because Tami has been gone long enough that I know she is at least halfway to the office. When Tami answers, the first words out of her mouth are, “I have your keys.” She realized it as soon as the phone rang and we both knew that our days were not starting in the way we had planned. The good news is that Tami loves me and told me she was heading back. Twenty minutes later, I had my keys and we both were off to start our day.

Every day I wake up with a plan as I continue my journey as a Christian. And even though I have a plan, it doesn’t mean that things are going to go as I planned. Obstacles will come along that can be minor, like forgetting a car key, or major, like discovering a problem that can’t be solved by simply taking twenty minutes to go back home. Whatever the obstacles are, they are not meant to discourage or cause us to give up but instead to teach us about the realities of life. Some obstacles are created because of my ignorance while others are just part of the process of everyday life. Use the obstacles to help you become more complete in Christ. Use them to help you grow the character of God into your life, and soon you’ll be impacting others in a positive way with the gospel message. The greatest thing we can do is help others face the obstacles that cross their paths by pointing them to the true answer, Jesus Christ.

What Do You Expect?

There are certain events in our lives that have expectations attached. For instance, on my birthday, I expect somebody to wish me a happy birthday and at the least to receive a card. At Christmas, I expect to get something special from Tami. On our anniversary each year, I expect to hear those special words from Tami that reassure me that she loves me. What events happen in your life where you have expectations?

Just as I have expectations in other areas of life, there are also expectations in my spiritual life. When I come to worship I expect to sense God’s presence. The Bible reassures me that His presence will be there, but what attitude do I bring that will allow God into my life? If I’m not careful I can come to a service consumed by the details of life, which can occupy the entire time set aside to worship with my church family. These distractions can be of great importance or simply things I’m looking forward to in life. In a few weeks we will have our first Couples Breakaway, and I’m consumed with preparations for it—writing, reading, talking to Tami and the staff, wanting to create the perfect weekend because it’s important to me. It has consumed most of my free time and until it finishes it will always be on my mind. Along with that, several other things have occupied my thoughts and time, such as evenings out with friends and family, projects around the house, and just finding time to relax. I’ve learned that I can accomplish all of these things if I learn how to create balance and best utilize my time. I will be ready for the breakaway, I do have special times to spend with family and friends, and I am getting projects done around the house as well as relaxing and being refreshed. When I go to church on Sundays, I have expectations. I anticipate sensing God’s presence in my life, I plan to learn something new that I can apply to my life as a part of His family, and I expect to feel the love of my Christian family.

What I’ve learned through the years is this, and it’s key for meeting your expectations of a service: If I expect nothing then I’ll most likely experience nothing. However, if I expect those things I wrote about, then I’ll open up my life and focus on what God has planned for me in that service. I’ll find everything fulfilled that I pray for and desire. 

Consider the Cost

A few months ago, Tami and I decided that we needed to start doing some updates to our home. We’ve lived here for over 10 years and the house was built in the late 1990s. With little knowledge on the subject, we really didn’t know where to go or whom to talk with, so we did the normal thing…Google. Our problem was that we didn’t know what we wanted to do, and we’re not very creative when it comes to interior design. So, we found a company less than a mile from our house that has won several awards for home redesigning and remodeling and thought they’d be a great place to start. 

We set up an appointment and met with our designer. We brought pictures of the areas we wanted to update and sat at a computer for an hour and a half discussing ideas. I must say, a few of the ideas really sounded like they would look amazing in our home. During that meeting Tami and I grew more excited, but at the end we were told the rough cost, which I was sure would end up being higher. 

To give you an idea, we are looking at redesigning our kitchen and possibly our master bath. We had an estimate in mind of what it would likely cost. When our designer told us the cost of the kitchen updates she was at the budget we’d imagined, but the total did not include any of the flooring and did not involve our bathroom at all. So it comes down to choosing a company that would double our planned costs, cutting back on our home’s updates, or finding people to do the work by using this company’s ideas as a starting point. We understood going into the meeting that it was more important for us to get ideas and knowledge, so we could then find builders to accomplish our goals for a much lower cost. We will go forward and at some point our home will be updated, it just won’t be with this company.

As we’ve gone through this experience it reminded me of the scripture that tells us to “consider the cost.” The Bible teaches me how to live an effective life for Christ, but to develop into that person He intended for me to be I must first ask myself if I’m willing to pay the price. The Christian life is the most fulfilling and rewarding life a person can experience if that person stays true to what the Bible teaches. Many times Christians become frustrated and discouraged because they don’t consider the cost and only invest in getting halfway to where they need to be. Yes, there are difficult moments, but I can tell you that there are far greater moments of peace and security because of understanding the cost of the commitment I’ve made to Christ. Just as we will have projects completed to improve and update our home, Christ will continue to work in my life to help make me the man of God He wants me to be. It may take a little longer in some areas, but it will be done—both in our home and in my life as a follower of Jesus Christ.